Objective Collapse Theories offer a explanation of quantum mechanics that is at once brand new and based in classical mechanics. In the world of quantum mechanics, it’s no big deal for particles to be in multiple different states at the same time, or to teleport between locations, or to influence each other faster than light. But somehow, none of this strangeness makes its way to the familiar scale of human beings - even though our world is made entirely of quantum-weird building blocks. The explanations of this transition range from the mystical influence of the conscious mind to the grandiose proposition of multiple realities. But Objective Collapse Theories feels as down to earth as the classical world that we’re trying to explain. Let’s see if it makes any sense.